








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 834 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 452 matches | ||
| Wingman | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6398 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 38,415 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10009 | 26% |
| Smokes | 9560 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 9436 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 9410 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,113,292 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 308 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ELUDEBEAR | 60% | 58 |
| #2 | heat | 54% | 197 |
| #3 | HvyArms | 54% | 168 |
| #4 | Rasaqboi | 52% | 129 |
| #5 | TassoN` | 50% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | getxclean |HB| | 44% | 223 |
| #11 | nuunee | 43% | 372 |
| #12 | ignit3r | 43% | 267 |
| #13 | Fighta | 40% | 60 |
| #14 | secur | 40% | 98 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stoosh | 20 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | HvyArms | 12 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | ignit3r | 8 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | nuunee | 7 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | MJW | 6 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | getxclean |HB| | 511 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #2 | HvyArms | 476 | 0.13 | 11 min |
| #3 | MJW | 441 | 0.08 | 11 min |
| #4 | Stoosh | 422 | 0.06 | 11 min |
| #5 | ignit3r | 415 | 0.07 | 13 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rasaqboi | +2.54 | 68 | 67 |
| #2 | heat | +2.17 | 74 | 60 |
| #3 | MJW | +1.64 | 63 | 66 |
| #4 | ignit3r | +1.37 | 81 | 71 |
| #5 | maL^_^Ave | +1.35 | 60 | 65 |





