








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1364 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 331 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 84 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 40 matches | ||
| Faceit | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 67 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6422 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,247 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8690 | 27% |
| Smokes | 8543 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 7913 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 7101 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,010,867 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 928 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sennsei | 81% | 42 |
| #2 | Eay- | 78% | 112 |
| #3 | UnK | 73% | 390 |
| #4 | Neo-reload[tp | 72% | 219 |
| #5 | stavie/10/ | 71% | 107 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Neo-reload[tp | 17 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | Eay- | 16 | 0.0077 |
| #3 | UnK | 13 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | peterWZ | 5 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | stavie/10/ | 5 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | UnK | 1330 | 0.18 | 39 min |
| #2 | Eay- | 566 | 0.27 | 14 min |
| #3 | Khep | 430 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #4 | stavie/10/ | 429 | 0.20 | 10 min |
| #5 | peterWZ | 396 | 0.16 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | UnK | +4.59 | 87 | 74 |
| #2 | sennsei | +4.32 | 90 | 73 |
| #3 | stavie/10/ | +4.22 | 85 | 69 |
| #4 | Eay- | +1.85 | 89 | 69 |
| #5 | Neo-reload[tp | +1.75 | 85 | 64 |





