








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 490 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 177 matches | ||
| Premier | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 82 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3211 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,421 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4551 | 28% |
| Smokes | 4853 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3635 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 3382 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $443,889 of utility $67 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 280 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SmirHoF^ | 67% | 33 |
| #2 | HASHIRAMA SENJU | 60% | 112 |
| #3 | DJdal | 55% | 149 |
| #4 | PartyKloVN | 54% | 112 |
| #5 | KGaard | 54% | 107 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | KGaard | 54% | 107 |
| #6 | Dennis sg'u da | 53% | 155 |
| #7 | Bigmikelarry | 53% | 167 |
| #8 | Breinholt | 53% | 205 |
| #9 | Dehlendorff | 45% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Breinholt | 3 | 0.0007 |
| #2 | Bigmikelarry | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #3 | DJdal | 1 | 0.0003 |
| #4 | PartyKloVN | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | KGaard | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Breinholt | 486 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #2 | DJdal | 334 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #3 | HASHIRAMA SENJU | 322 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| #4 | KGaard | 292 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #5 | Dennis sg'u da | 260 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1smand | +3.86 | 81 | 79 |
| #2 | KGaard | +1.26 | 75 | 72 |
| #3 | HASHIRAMA SENJU | +1.07 | 59 | 72 |
| #4 | DJdal | +0.79 | 57 | 70 |
| #5 | PartyKloVN | -1.06 | 48 | 66 |





