








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 317 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 340 matches | ||
| Faceit | 84 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




50 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6405 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,289 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5981 | 24% |
| Smokes | 6782 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 5435 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 7091 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,478,270 of utility $169 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 180 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PuffPuffPass | 53% | 60 |
| #2 | Eli | 53% | 36 |
| #3 | Pex1 | 49% | 37 |
| #4 | Nani | 48% | 221 |
| #5 | Derloost | 48% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Litti Peukku | 44% | 55 |
| #9 | zoniK | 42% | 50 |
| #10 | Mur0c | 41% | 41 |
| #11 | Malibu I♿I⛟I♿I⛟I♿I⛟ | 41% | 66 |
| #12 | KacE | 37% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KacE | 11 | 0.0137 |
| #2 | Malibu I♿I⛟I♿I⛟I♿I⛟ | 5 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | PuffPuffPass | 5 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | Nani | 3 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Cobb | 3 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nani | 1130 | 0.25 | 31 min |
| #2 | Malibu I♿I⛟I♿I⛟I♿I⛟ | 207 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #3 | Derloost | 178 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #4 | zoniK | 161 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #5 | anZiR | 145 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PuffPuffPass | +2.47 | 78 | 50 |
| #2 | KacE | +2.37 | 55 | 69 |
| #3 | Malibu I♿I⛟I♿I⛟I♿I⛟ | +1.36 | 62 | 65 |
| #4 | anZiR | +0.45 | 73 | 51 |
| #5 | Eli | +0.44 | 59 | 78 |





