








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 263 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3258 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,604 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2514 | 22% |
| Smokes | 2447 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 4878 | 42% |
| Molotovs | 1765 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,038,152 of utility $190 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 34 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Kohnert | 43% | 96 |
| #10 | jspec | 42% | 38 |
| #11 | leehuffman | 42% | 238 |
| #12 | i dunno man you do you | 38% | 302 |
| #13 | nux | 31% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mosh | 11 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | i dunno man you do you | 9 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | adam | 6 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | leehuffman | 6 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Kohnert | 6 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | i dunno man you do you | 1277 | 0.21 | 30 min |
| #2 | adam | 574 | 0.10 | 16 min |
| #3 | leehuffman | 494 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #4 | mosh | 476 | 0.08 | 11 min |
| #5 | head-to-toe bootleg gucci | 365 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jspec | +6.04 | 69 | 69 |
| #2 | Kohnert | +3.10 | 80 | 72 |
| #3 | chase | +2.61 | 77 | 78 |
| #4 | mosh | +2.00 | 73 | 59 |
| #5 | adam | +1.71 | 49 | 72 |





