










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 112 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
598 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,251 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 93 | 7% |
| Smokes | 490 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 157 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 511 | 41% |
Our logs show you have wasted $190,242 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 22 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | spencer | 75% | 4 |
| #2 | satrams | 61% | 49 |
| #3 | Ikgrid | 60% | 5 |
| #4 | soup bud | 50% | 16 |
| #5 | Van Dinner | 44% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Ikgrid | 60% | 5 |
| #4 | soup bud | 50% | 16 |
| #5 | Van Dinner | 44% | 18 |
| #6 | GCSChris | 33% | 18 |
| #7 | Asa | 15% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | satrams | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | Ikgrid | 1 | 0.0104 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | satrams | 222 | 0.24 | 5 min |
| #2 | GCSChris | 84 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #3 | Van Dinner | 71 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #4 | Asa | 47 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #5 | soup bud | 30 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Solister | +2.60 | 76 | 21 |
| #2 | spencer | +2.59 | 58 | 79 |
| #3 | satrams | +2.41 | 77 | 53 |
| #4 | GCSChris | +0.60 | 81 | 61 |
| #5 | soup bud | -0.44 | 46 | 25 |





