








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 487 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 78 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1164 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,042 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 346 | 17% |
| Smokes | 712 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 394 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 590 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $631,755 of utility $192 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 201 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SamppaLinna | 59% | 22 |
| #2 | Döppeli | 52% | 71 |
| #3 | Turvakypärä Samuel | 48% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SamppaLinna | 59% | 22 |
| #2 | Döppeli | 52% | 71 |
| #3 | Turvakypärä Samuel | 48% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Döppeli | 22 | 0.0158 |
| #2 | SamppaLinna | 5 | 0.0123 |
| #3 | Turvakypärä Samuel | 1 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Döppeli | 92 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #2 | SamppaLinna | 54 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #3 | Turvakypärä Samuel | 44 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SamppaLinna | +5.56 | 59 | 65 |
| #2 | Turvakypärä Samuel | +5.13 | 72 | 62 |
| #3 | Mixu | +1.45 | 39 | 24 |
| #4 | Döppeli | -2.85 | 23 | 39 |





