








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 14 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 5 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
41 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 49 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 21 | 43% |
| Smokes | 13 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 13 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2 | 4% |
Our logs show you have wasted $18,805 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Brittmarie | 50% | 2 |
| #2 | Dahlen :D | 25% | 4 |
| #3 | 76561198833244241 | 0% | 2 |
| #4 | . | 0% | 2 |
| #5 | Passters | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Brittmarie | 50% | 2 |
| #2 | Dahlen :D | 25% | 4 |
| #3 | 76561198833244241 | 0% | 2 |
| #4 | . | 0% | 2 |
| #5 | Passters | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dahlen :D | 5 | 0.0909 |
| #2 | Passters | 2 | 0.0556 |
| #3 | 76561198833244241 | 2 | 0.0588 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Passters | 11 | 0.31 | 0 min |
| #2 | . | 8 | 0.24 | 0 min |
| #3 | Dahlen :D | 5 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #4 | Brittmarie | 5 | 0.14 | 0 min |
| #5 | 76561198833244241 | 4 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dahlen :D | +4.55 | 90 | 41 |
| #2 | 76561198833244241 | +4.17 | 67 | 30 |
| #3 | . | +0.68 | 63 | 52 |
| #4 | SWAZY????? | -0.62 | 72 | 17 |
| #5 | Passters | -3.14 | 84 | 47 |





