








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 534 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 108 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1833 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,405 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1924 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1756 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1704 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1021 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $665,616 of utility $184 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 818 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zn1bor | 91% | 11 |
| #2 | Urka | 79% | 14 |
| #3 | FrancisJ III | 70% | 23 |
| #4 | -Dullah | 62% | 26 |
| #5 | zuzu | 60% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -Dullah | 6 | 0.0124 |
| #2 | Mori | 5 | 0.0151 |
| #3 | etnelav | 4 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | nice cats | 4 | 0.0049 |
| #5 | FrancisJ III | 2 | 0.0045 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nice cats | 239 | 0.29 | 6 min |
| #2 | -Dullah | 81 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #3 | Mori | 72 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| #4 | FrancisJ III | 61 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | Urka | 34 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MEEEEEOWツ | +4.37 | 75 | 71 |
| #2 | zuzu | +2.46 | 73 | 15 |
| #3 | -Dullah | +2.41 | 82 | 56 |
| #4 | Mori | +1.30 | 64 | 64 |
| #5 | nice cats | +0.88 | 60 | 75 |





