








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1485 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 235 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 105 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Premier | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




112 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5901 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,783 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5759 | 32% |
| Smokes | 4642 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 5350 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2032 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,107,311 of utility $93 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2599 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Demcio | 62% | 138 |
| #3 | korzmaks | 59% | 161 |
| #4 | ORP_Blyskawica | 55% | 170 |
| #5 | Mikser | 53% | 45 |
| #6 | Slamz suk | 53% | 59 |





