








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 317 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Premier | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1117 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,246 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1711 | 53% |
| Smokes | 177 | 5% |
| HE Grenades | 807 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 551 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $305,893 of utility $83 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 202 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kalister | 72% | 18 |
| #2 | макито косаламо | 51% | 45 |
| #3 | бехмир | 49% | 118 |
| #4 | joca_bar | 46% | 95 |
| #5 | Ordi | 44% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | макито косаламо | 51% | 45 |
| #3 | бехмир | 49% | 118 |
| #4 | joca_bar | 46% | 95 |
| #5 | Ordi | 44% | 16 |
| #6 | angel | 36% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | joca_bar | 27 | 0.0149 |
| #2 | бехмир | 24 | 0.0106 |
| #3 | макито косаламо | 6 | 0.0071 |
| #4 | angel | 5 | 0.0183 |
| #5 | Kalister | 3 | 0.0086 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | бехмир | 516 | 0.23 | 9 min |
| #2 | joca_bar | 206 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | макито косаламо | 95 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | Kalister | 47 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | Ordi | 45 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kalister | +5.40 | 72 | 59 |
| #2 | макито косаламо | +5.07 | 91 | 59 |
| #3 | бехмир | +3.71 | 66 | 49 |
| #4 | joca_bar | +0.60 | 42 | 50 |
| #5 | SkankovaKita | -1.42 | 46 | 40 |





