








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 403 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 142 matches | ||
| Premier | 93 matches | ||
| Faceit | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Esplay | 18 matches | 1,560 | |
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




67 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4269 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,373 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1430 | 33% |
| Smokes | 737 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 1053 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1153 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,337,475 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 285 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fyrtiotvå | 71 | 0.0265 |
| #2 | Dahlberg | 21 | 0.0072 |
| #3 | nnnnttr | 13 | 0.0151 |
| #4 | urban dolmemos | 4 | 0.0084 |
| #5 | JerryJamarN^ | 3 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fyrtiotvå | 1030 | 0.38 | 18 min |
| #2 | Dahlberg | 607 | 0.21 | 15 min |
| #3 | nnnnttr | 201 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| #4 | urban dolmemos | 49 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | blank | 34 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | blank | +4.67 | 89 | 53 |
| #2 | Dahlberg | +2.44 | 67 | 65 |
| #3 | Fyrtiotvå | +1.51 | 63 | 55 |
| #4 | nnnnttr | +1.02 | 54 | 44 |
| #5 | urban dolmemos | +0.33 | 59 | 50 |





