








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 840 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 57 matches | ||
| Premier | 46 matches | ||
| Esplay | 1 match | 1,886 |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1765 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,219 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 743 | 23% |
| Smokes | 916 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 640 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 920 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $617,751 of utility $249 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 636 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nexianz | +3.60 | 88 | 58 |
| #2 | Me2 | +1.28 | 69 | 60 |
| #3 | Andy | -0.53 | 53 | 35 |
| #4 | Dugi | -0.90 | 67 | 64 |
| #5 | sjif-fis | -0.95 | 80 | 36 |





