








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 457 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 117 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Wingman | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1827 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,206 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1732 | 41% |
| Smokes | 1206 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 769 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 499 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $616,860 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1492 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Latino Uncle Ruckus | 60% | 65 |
| #2 | Yuri! jxshan | 51% | 47 |
| #3 | AveGGson (csfloat.com) | 43% | 28 |
| #4 | CordlessDud | 38% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Latino Uncle Ruckus | 60% | 65 |
| #2 | Yuri! jxshan | 51% | 47 |
| #3 | AveGGson (csfloat.com) | 43% | 28 |
| #4 | CordlessDud | 38% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yuri! jxshan | 12 | 0.0126 |
| #2 | AveGGson (csfloat.com) | 10 | 0.0190 |
| #3 | Latino Uncle Ruckus | 4 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | CordlessDud | 3 | 0.0096 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Latino Uncle Ruckus | 285 | 0.23 | 6 min |
| #2 | AveGGson (csfloat.com) | 129 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #3 | Yuri! jxshan | 54 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | CordlessDud | 7 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Latino Uncle Ruckus | +1.95 | 46 | 56 |
| #2 | ZephyrMax | +0.57 | 44 | 41 |
| #3 | Yuri! jxshan | -1.62 | 24 | 17 |
| #4 | AveGGson (csfloat.com) | -1.76 | 34 | 60 |
| #5 | CordlessDud | -6.18 | 15 | 19 |





