








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 91 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
536 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,235 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 391 | 32% |
| Smokes | 223 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 334 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 287 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $202,653 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ߷ | 56% | 41 |
| #2 | VJVJ | 48% | 50 |
| #3 | rizzmo laitela | 45% | 33 |
| #4 | moneycriminal | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ߷ | 56% | 41 |
| #2 | VJVJ | 48% | 50 |
| #3 | rizzmo laitela | 45% | 33 |
| #4 | moneycriminal | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VJVJ | 16 | 0.0188 |
| #2 | rizzmo laitela | 13 | 0.0218 |
| #3 | ߷ | 7 | 0.0101 |
| #4 | moneycriminal | 3 | 0.0380 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ߷ | 67 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #2 | rizzmo laitela | 66 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #3 | VJVJ | 60 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | moneycriminal | 2 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VJVJ | +2.57 | 65 | 51 |
| #2 | rizzmo laitela | +2.53 | 87 | 59 |
| #3 | moneycriminal | +2.53 | 65 | 41 |
| #4 | ߷ | +2.08 | 53 | 41 |
| #5 | Kismet | -2.26 | 40 | 38 |





