








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 68 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 165 matches | ||
| Premier | 87 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 55 matches | ||
| Wingman | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




112 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7767 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,358 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2624 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1887 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 3882 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 1965 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,620,811 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 40 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tadashi | 60% | 113 |
| #2 | Prázdné ruce plný nos | 60% | 72 |
| #3 | Yobany savage | 56% | 316 |
| #4 | __M0L3__ | 56% | 50 |
| #5 | Pattyxq | 51% | 245 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Yobany savage | 56% | 316 |
| #4 | __M0L3__ | 56% | 50 |
| #5 | Pattyxq | 51% | 245 |
| #6 | Dephaze | 49% | 189 |
| #7 | GiggaMan | 49% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pattyxq | 45 | 0.0092 |
| #2 | tadashi | 38 | 0.0170 |
| #3 | Yobany savage | 33 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | Dephaze | 19 | 0.0051 |
| #5 | __M0L3__ | 18 | 0.0176 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pattyxq | 796 | 0.16 | 17 min |
| #2 | tadashi | 430 | 0.19 | 10 min |
| #3 | GiggaMan | 144 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #4 | Yobany savage | 139 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #5 | Dephaze | 117 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pattyxq | +6.50 | 83 | 55 |
| #2 | tadashi | +4.55 | 75 | 56 |
| #3 | skmpx | +2.26 | 82 | 39 |
| #4 | __M0L3__ | +0.79 | 66 | 45 |
| #5 | Yobany savage | -1.10 | 33 | 27 |





