








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 843 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 43 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




128 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3908 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,792 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1873 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2271 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1868 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1780 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,343,553 of utility $209 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1027 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Das Auto. | 74% | 19 |
| #2 | Alfie is a good | 58% | 206 |
| #3 | lirrics | 57% | 120 |
| #4 | martingamer73 | 56% | 268 |
| #5 | Martin Luther Ping | 55% | 104 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | lirrics | 57% | 120 |
| #4 | martingamer73 | 56% | 268 |
| #5 | Martin Luther Ping | 55% | 104 |
| #6 | krunds | 53% | 43 |
| #7 | James Doakes | 49% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | martingamer73 | 82 | 0.0151 |
| #2 | Alfie is a good | 54 | 0.0129 |
| #3 | Martin Luther Ping | 23 | 0.0110 |
| #4 | James Doakes | 19 | 0.0235 |
| #5 | lirrics | 16 | 0.0063 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | martingamer73 | 572 | 0.11 | 13 min |
| #2 | Alfie is a good | 311 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #3 | krunds | 186 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #4 | lirrics | 102 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | Martin Luther Ping | 52 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | krunds | +7.01 | 95 | 68 |
| #2 | fweewoom | +6.10 | 77 | 39 |
| #3 | martingamer73 | +0.50 | 50 | 49 |
| #4 | lirrics | -0.17 | 66 | 38 |
| #5 | James Doakes | -0.52 | 59 | 29 |





