








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 107 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Premier | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
589 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 559 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 108 | 19% |
| Smokes | 143 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 188 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 120 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $180,346 of utility $153 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 103 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Martin Luther Ping | 43% | 14 |
| #6 | Alfie is a good | 43% | 35 |
| #7 | martingamer73 | 41% | 39 |
| #8 | PerkPurple | 40% | 5 |
| #9 | krunds | 33% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fweewoom | 16 | 0.0193 |
| #2 | martingamer73 | 9 | 0.0123 |
| #3 | Alfie is a good | 7 | 0.0104 |
| #4 | Martin Luther Ping | 2 | 0.0076 |
| #5 | PerkPurple | 2 | 0.0189 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fweewoom | 93 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #2 | martingamer73 | 73 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #3 | Alfie is a good | 38 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | krunds | 26 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| #5 | lirrics | 14 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | krunds | +6.27 | 89 | 55 |
| #2 | fweewoom | +6.07 | 72 | 31 |
| #3 | PerkPurple | +5.85 | 60 | 20 |
| #4 | whiffmeister | +1.70 | 32 | 19 |
| #5 | lirrics | +1.35 | 56 | 41 |





