








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 331 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Esplay | 125 matches | 1,368 | |
| Premier | 30 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 70 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
903 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,622 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1121 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1476 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1227 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1798 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $836,849 of utility $209 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 135 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hanzi | 55% | 29 |
| #2 | ♔ RG' ♡ ᶫᵒᵛᵉᵧₒᵤ♡ GGDROP.COM | 50% | 32 |
| #3 | ♞ DiIlPALALAn | 48% | 126 |
| #4 | ♞ marängswiss | 47% | 88 |
| #5 | ♞ BubbelQ | 44% | 134 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | ♞ BubbelQ | 44% | 134 |
| #6 | ♞ The Pope | 43% | 30 |
| #7 | ♞ FistOfGod ¿•.•¿ | 40% | 30 |
| #8 | ♞ knatt | 39% | 18 |
| #9 | ♞ PhillePung | 36% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♞ BubbelQ | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | ♞ marängswiss | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | ♞ knatt | 2 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | ♞ DiIlPALALAn | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | ♔ RG' ♡ ᶫᵒᵛᵉᵧₒᵤ♡ GGDROP.COM | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♞ BubbelQ | 350 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| #2 | ♞ DiIlPALALAn | 308 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #3 | ♞ marängswiss | 140 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #4 | ♔ RG' ♡ ᶫᵒᵛᵉᵧₒᵤ♡ GGDROP.COM | 131 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #5 | ♞ The Pope | 77 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♔ RG' ♡ ᶫᵒᵛᵉᵧₒᵤ♡ GGDROP.COM | +3.71 | 58 | 72 |
| #2 | ♞ DiIlPALALAn | +2.78 | 47 | 69 |
| #3 | ♞ knatt | +2.44 | 52 | 68 |
| #4 | ♞ FistOfGod ¿•.•¿ | +1.79 | 51 | 70 |
| #5 | ♞ The Pope | +1.51 | 41 | 70 |





