








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 768 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 139 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3255 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,241 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3346 | 41% |
| Smokes | 2151 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 788 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 1956 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,051,746 of utility $192 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 80 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Jeziah | 57% | 23 |
| #7 | LordFuzzyNuts | 55% | 40 |
| #8 | Noah Hands | 53% | 89 |
| #9 | Mary Ann | 50% | 241 |
| #10 | farshad momeni | 43% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mary Ann | 714 | 0.14 | 16 min |
| #2 | farshad momeni | 127 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | xn | 116 | 0.31 | 2 min |
| #4 | Noah Hands | 115 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #5 | Jeziah | 105 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Booner | +4.16 | 85 | 64 |
| #2 | xn | +3.78 | 74 | 58 |
| #3 | Jeziah | +2.26 | 68 | 63 |
| #4 | Morty | +2.21 | 74 | 64 |
| #5 | Noah Hands | -0.21 | 59 | 47 |





