








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1568 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 208 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 101 matches | ||
| Wingman | 93 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 130 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




303 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6592 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,056 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3575 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3664 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3073 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2744 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,331,074 of utility $169 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1099 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | no | 150 | 0.0343 |
| #2 | rrxevz | 77 | 0.0337 |
| #3 | Vexy | 70 | 0.0217 |
| #4 | Tømiq | 55 | 0.0254 |
| #5 | kurgimees toivo | 39 | 0.0436 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vexy | 430 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #2 | SuperStalin67 | 423 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #3 | rrxevz | 403 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | no | 344 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #5 | kurgimees toivo | 296 | 0.33 | 3 min |





