








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 635 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 523 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 64 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




283 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
13059 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,272 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4183 | 17% |
| Smokes | 7758 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 6722 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 5609 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,499,070 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2392 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tobi | 52% | 442 |
| #2 | J4 | 52% | 430 |
| #3 | EL PATO | 51% | 183 |
| #4 | BeanBoyDelRio | 48% | 234 |
| #5 | FaZe SaLmOn NiGiRi | 36% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tobi | 52% | 442 |
| #2 | J4 | 52% | 430 |
| #3 | EL PATO | 51% | 183 |
| #4 | BeanBoyDelRio | 48% | 234 |
| #5 | FaZe SaLmOn NiGiRi | 36% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tobi | 172 | 0.0190 |
| #2 | J4 | 79 | 0.0089 |
| #3 | BeanBoyDelRio | 28 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | FaZe SaLmOn NiGiRi | 11 | 0.0099 |
| #5 | EL PATO | 10 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tobi | 1293 | 0.14 | 28 min |
| #2 | J4 | 1038 | 0.12 | 24 min |
| #3 | EL PATO | 351 | 0.09 | 10 min |
| #4 | BeanBoyDelRio | 290 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #5 | FaZe SaLmOn NiGiRi | 36 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ..... | +3.52 | 83 | 53 |
| #2 | EL PATO | +0.02 | 51 | 56 |
| #3 | tobi | -0.19 | 72 | 54 |
| #4 | J4 | -0.38 | 64 | 48 |
| #5 | BeanBoyDelRio | -3.63 | 30 | 36 |





