








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 19 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 216 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2253 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,383 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1856 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2079 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2016 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1432 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $959,404 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Botres | 48% | 97 |
| #7 | GreFly | 47% | 55 |
| #8 | 主人 TheBeast | 44% | 18 |
| #9 | Quissu | 42% | 60 |
| #10 | ETSL ROOMET SÄÄLIK | 39% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WhySoBot banditcamp.com | 20 | 0.0060 |
| #2 | Loverboy | 17 | 0.0089 |
| #3 | R2mmar | 9 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | Botres | 8 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | GreFly | 5 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Botres | 386 | 0.20 | 10 min |
| #2 | WhySoBot banditcamp.com | 209 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #3 | 600 | 202 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #4 | R2mmar | 186 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | Loverboy | 177 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GreFly | +3.48 | 67 | 56 |
| #2 | R2mmar | +1.94 | 82 | 50 |
| #3 | 600 | +1.93 | 51 | 62 |
| #4 | Botres | +1.44 | 57 | 65 |
| #5 | WhySoBot banditcamp.com | +0.36 | 42 | 44 |





