








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 170 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3491 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,318 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4800 | 39% |
| Smokes | 3832 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1590 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 2096 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $878,392 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 766 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...

| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | RΣCҜLΣSS DUҜΣ | 42% | 26 |
| #9 | Rawn | 40% | 35 |
| #10 | ![]() kraT0$ | 39% | 44 |
| #11 | ![]() 𝓦ɑɗ𝑒 AnonyMouse | 32% | 37 |
| #12 | 𝗡𝗢𝗕𝗜𝗧𝗔 | 27% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪☠︎VIPER☠︎✪ | 15 | 0.0101 |
| #2 | shanky | 5 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | ![]() BeYonD | 4 | 0.0058 |
| #4 | JP | 4 | 0.0085 |
| #5 | Rogers | 3 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shanky | 197 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #2 | Rogers | 170 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #3 | ✪☠︎VIPER☠︎✪ | 114 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | ![]() kraT0$ | 114 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | ![]() Butler | 61 | 0.14 | 2 min |





