








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 614 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 93 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1233 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,086 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1075 | 26% |
| Smokes | 366 | 9% |
| HE Grenades | 1352 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 1293 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $752,458 of utility $225 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 349 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Sundrip ツ | 53% | 36 |
| #5 | HAZiiE | 52% | 64 |
| #6 | Die Langa Mabumafu | 50% | 10 |
| #7 | Dobs | 40% | 20 |
| #8 | Bread | 33% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sundrip ツ | +4.02 | 88 | 55 |
| #2 | Bread | +3.69 | 86 | 38 |
| #3 | Die Langa Mabumafu | +2.71 | 82 | 44 |
| #4 | HAZiiE | +2.10 | 75 | 46 |
| #5 | KOKKIES | +1.90 | 75 | 75 |





