










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 429 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 29 matches | ||
| Esplay | 27 matches | 1,606 | |
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 78 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4754 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,844 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1673 | 11% |
| Smokes | 5515 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 3530 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4126 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,899,064 of utility $239 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 538 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Sp|ineS | 48% | 44 |
| #11 | ElTaco | 47% | 107 |
| #12 | Vailent! | 44% | 94 |
| #13 | `cuRRe- | 42% | 77 |
| #14 | straum | 35% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CHREASY | +2.34 | 69 | 70 |
| #2 | straum | +2.06 | 80 | 62 |
| #3 | gizze | +1.53 | 70 | 69 |
| #4 | Sp|ineS | +1.25 | 58 | 79 |
| #5 | Andersson | +1.05 | 59 | 83 |





