








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 317 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 182 matches | ||
| Premier | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2467 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,812 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2226 | 21% |
| Smokes | 2650 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2942 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2994 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $732,003 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 52 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Icenosi | 84% | 19 |
| #2 | Bongwater Brian | 80% | 15 |
| #3 | ♥ JWalker ♥ | 76% | 25 |
| #4 | E.M.A Búbbla | 76% | 25 |
| #5 | coxer | 71% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Flexy | 65% | 17 |
| #8 | artur | 60% | 15 |
| #9 | TapiNn | 59% | 17 |
| #10 | rufus | 53% | 15 |
| #11 | Orsen | 50% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | E.M.A Búbbla | 5 | 0.0113 |
| #2 | artur | 3 | 0.0088 |
| #3 | Thelostluck | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | rufus | 1 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Thelostluck | 89 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #2 | rufus | 87 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| #3 | ♥ JWalker ♥ | 82 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #4 | Bongwater Brian | 72 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #5 | Orsen | 71 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bongwater Brian | +2.89 | 89 | 71 |
| #2 | Thelostluck | +2.01 | 77 | 78 |
| #3 | E.M.A Búbbla | +1.59 | 63 | 58 |
| #4 | ♥ JWalker ♥ | +1.38 | 73 | 66 |
| #5 | rufus | +1.32 | 80 | 65 |





