








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 90 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 141 matches | ||
| Wingman | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




62 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3504 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,321 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3198 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2072 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 3157 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2894 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $875,486 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 524 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Morgacin | 67% | 21 |
| #2 | KaKaShI | 60% | 20 |
| #3 | MayNotSkill | 52% | 73 |
| #4 | Hadschin | 50% | 22 |
| #5 | Janiaros | 50% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MayNotSkill | 242 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #2 | iTaXx' | 90 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #3 | KaKaShI | 87 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #4 | Morgacin | 59 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | Hadschin | 51 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iTaXx' | +1.63 | 72 | 49 |
| #2 | Hadschin | +1.62 | 75 | 63 |
| #3 | MayNotSkill | +1.48 | 48 | 59 |
| #4 | Morgacin | +1.18 | 35 | 64 |
| #5 | EisKaffee™ | +0.84 | 71 | 55 |





