








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 246 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 183 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




93 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2556 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,598 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2151 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2759 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1932 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1756 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,655,649 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 260 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jackve | 44% | 233 |
| #2 | Day4125 | 43% | 400 |
| #3 | Yonker | 41% | 93 |
| #4 | Kintaro | 40% | 161 |
| #5 | Shrub killa ^-^ | 39% | 327 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shrub killa ^-^ | 102 | 0.0154 |
| #2 | Day4125 | 52 | 0.0064 |
| #3 | Kintaro | 16 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | eris | 10 | 0.0062 |
| #5 | jackve | 9 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shrub killa ^-^ | 1184 | 0.18 | 27 min |
| #2 | jackve | 692 | 0.15 | 21 min |
| #3 | Day4125 | 677 | 0.08 | 14 min |
| #4 | eris | 213 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #5 | Kintaro | 196 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jackve | +6.63 | 82 | 67 |
| #2 | eris | +4.82 | 91 | 55 |
| #3 | Kintaro | +2.21 | 55 | 46 |
| #4 | Shrub killa ^-^ | +1.02 | 45 | 57 |
| #5 | Yonker | -0.26 | 53 | 42 |





