








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 14 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 40 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
691 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,824 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 279 | 15% |
| Smokes | 561 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 635 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 349 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $92,733 of utility $62 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 47 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1337 | 89% | 9 |
| #2 | Mr. wasgehtsiedassan | 86% | 7 |
| #3 | rxsk | 72% | 18 |
| #4 | gzey | 70% | 10 |
| #5 | Mickie_KrauseLP | 60% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sandbank | 5 | 0.0256 |
| #2 | 1337 | 1 | 0.0057 |
| #3 | Mr. wasgehtsiedassan | 1 | 0.0078 |
| #4 | Mickie_KrauseLP | 1 | 0.0114 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gzey | 17 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #2 | 1337 | 16 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | rxsk | 14 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #4 | Sandbank | 13 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #5 | Mr. wasgehtsiedassan | 8 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr. wasgehtsiedassan | +7.35 | 68 | 38 |
| #2 | 1337 | +5.06 | 70 | 60 |
| #3 | gzey | +3.24 | 77 | 58 |
| #4 | prachtvoll | +3.10 | 71 | 50 |
| #5 | rxsk | +2.84 | 63 | 34 |





