








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1065 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 164 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 84 matches | ||
| Wingman | 56 matches | ||
| Faceit | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




67 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6316 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,999 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3143 | 22% |
| Smokes | 5120 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 4693 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 1043 | 7% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,990,234 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 430 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | マイケル | 715 | 0.17 | 18 min |
| #2 | johndsten.Duck | 379 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #3 | 𝓐𝓛𝓔𝓧 | 306 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | Kumlander | 265 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #5 | Maxthetax971 | 194 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | マイケル | +2.95 | 79 | 60 |
| #2 | johndsten.Duck | +2.28 | 83 | 66 |
| #3 | Trött som gatan | +2.14 | 77 | 52 |
| #4 | Twingo.friffs | +0.91 | 53 | 31 |
| #5 | 𝓐𝓛𝓔𝓧 | -0.56 | 60 | 59 |





