










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 41 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
706 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,271 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 327 | 14% |
| Smokes | 620 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 653 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 671 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $149,865 of utility $71 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zeta | 65% | 20 |
| #2 | dorffi | 63% | 19 |
| #3 | Silakka200 | 62% | 39 |
| #4 | arl1ng | 58% | 62 |
| #5 | nilo | 56% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | arl1ng | 13 | 0.0096 |
| #2 | Carlos | 8 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | nilo | 6 | 0.0119 |
| #4 | Silakka200 | 3 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | zeta | 3 | 0.0075 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Carlos | 306 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #2 | arl1ng | 235 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #3 | Silakka200 | 148 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #4 | zeta | 59 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #5 | nilo | 36 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nilo | +6.45 | 82 | 53 |
| #2 | Silakka200 | +4.02 | 68 | 71 |
| #3 | dorffi | +2.76 | 81 | 56 |
| #4 | arl1ng | +0.63 | 59 | 66 |
| #5 | JARI | +0.19 | 67 | 56 |





