








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 15 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 462 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2829 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,902 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 870 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1055 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1252 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 725 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,865,556 of utility $186 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FkN | FukisuK | 48% | 61 |
| #2 | FkN | rollin' | 46% | 130 |
| #3 | Mj2.WasteOfSpace | 46% | 309 |
| #4 | FkN | Dingle Berry | 45% | 67 |
| #5 | -=Stealthy Healthy=- | 43% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mj2.WasteOfSpace | 19 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | FkN | Dingle Berry | 4 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | FkN | rollin' | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | FkN | FukisuK | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | The$guy | 2 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mj2.WasteOfSpace | +1.48 | 61 | 6 |
| #2 | FkN | ☢MoRbiD☢ | +0.80 | 54 | 55 |
| #3 | FkN | rollin' | +0.75 | 64 | 43 |
| #4 | -=Stealthy Healthy=- | +0.41 | 37 | 54 |
| #5 | FkN | Dingle Berry | +0.12 | 33 | 43 |





