








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1162 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 339 matches | ||
| Premier | 172 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




170 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8260 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,500 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9035 | 33% |
| Smokes | 7049 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 5541 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 5875 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,710,769 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2472 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kÄÄk | 57% | 89 |
| #2 | Fr5sh | 55% | 157 |
| #3 | Joosef (Nasareth) | 55% | 99 |
| #4 | Makkaramies | 53% | 103 |
| #5 | Louhiss | 53% | 242 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Louhiss | 53% | 242 |
| #6 | :) | 53% | 207 |
| #7 | Malminkeburulla | 52% | 56 |
| #8 | Julizki | 52% | 172 |
| #9 | Guppy)) | 50% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Makkaramies | 43 | 0.0216 |
| #2 | Malminkeburulla | 22 | 0.0198 |
| #3 | Joosef (Nasareth) | 5 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | Fr5sh | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | Louhiss | 1 | 0.0002 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Louhiss | 1090 | 0.21 | 34 min |
| #2 | Fr5sh | 776 | 0.23 | 21 min |
| #3 | :) | 546 | 0.12 | 14 min |
| #4 | Makkaramies | 281 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #5 | Julizki | 234 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moroara | +2.87 | 88 | 70 |
| #2 | Julizki | +0.53 | 79 | 73 |
| #3 | Louhiss | +0.05 | 72 | 74 |
| #4 | kÄÄk | -0.26 | 69 | 57 |
| #5 | Makkaramies | -0.46 | 62 | 34 |





