








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 522 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 490 matches | ||
| Premier | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5570 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,309 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6697 | 29% |
| Smokes | 7566 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 3956 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 5090 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,169,379 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 319 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Guppy)) | 59% | 46 |
| #2 | Nipah ツ | 55% | 69 |
| #3 | Fr5sh | 55% | 168 |
| #4 | JulleS | 54% | 76 |
| #5 | kÄÄk | 54% | 155 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Normaali | 52% | 33 |
| #9 | Julizki | 51% | 201 |
| #10 | Kailando | 51% | 108 |
| #11 | Tumpe | 48% | 114 |
| #12 | lev1z | 46% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moroara | 5 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | :) | 3 | 0.0005 |
| #3 | Julizki | 3 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | Fr5sh | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | Nipah ツ | 3 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moroara | 861 | 0.16 | 28 min |
| #2 | Fr5sh | 817 | 0.22 | 22 min |
| #3 | :) | 662 | 0.11 | 17 min |
| #4 | Kailando | 419 | 0.20 | 11 min |
| #5 | kÄÄk | 283 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Normaali | +4.17 | 84 | 78 |
| #2 | Tumpe | +1.36 | 79 | 67 |
| #3 | Moroara | +1.24 | 88 | 68 |
| #4 | Julizki | +0.50 | 79 | 74 |
| #5 | Louhiss | +0.38 | 73 | 72 |





