








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 95 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 337 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 104 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3284 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,513 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7125 | 30% |
| Smokes | 6208 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 5220 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 4960 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $546,008 of utility $59 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 403 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gschmeidige.BimsNudel | 64% | 70 |
| #2 | loppa | 62% | 29 |
| #3 | LookAtMee | 56% | 124 |
| #4 | loppo | 55% | 242 |
| #5 | Basinga | 55% | 141 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | loppo | 11 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | moon | 6 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | LookAtMee | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | sizzzzzzz | 3 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | Basinga | 2 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gschmeidige.BimsNudel | +4.21 | 88 | 75 |
| #2 | Basinga | +3.42 | 86 | 76 |
| #3 | loppa | +3.03 | 81 | 60 |
| #4 | loppo | +1.03 | 74 | 55 |
| #5 | Heavnerboy | +0.71 | 69 | 76 |





