








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 317 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2645 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,462 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2363 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1773 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2400 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1926 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $908,829 of utility $153 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 495 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | D | 69% | 36 |
| #2 | r!zzla|king | 69% | 48 |
| #3 | CHILLO_PUTI_KILLER | 66% | 38 |
| #4 | ☣️Achilles | 63% | 49 |
| #5 | Tyler | 63% | 88 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝙁𝘼𝙄𝙏𝙃_ igotHacked | 281 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #2 | 𝙈𝙤𝙣𝙖𝙧𝙘𝙝 | 261 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #3 | ☣️Achilles | 185 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #4 | NO 1 LIKE ME | 162 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #5 | Tyler | 134 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | r!zzla|king | +4.24 | 78 | 63 |
| #2 | NO 1 LIKE ME | +3.40 | 69 | 53 |
| #3 | D | +2.17 | 68 | 56 |
| #4 | CHILLO_PUTI_KILLER | +1.56 | 69 | 32 |
| #5 | 𝙈𝙤𝙣𝙖𝙧𝙘𝙝 | +1.33 | 68 | 61 |





