








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1489 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 2250 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 122 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




167 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
14535 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 47,597 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9900 | 21% |
| Smokes | 7850 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 14848 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 14999 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,707,804 of utility $76 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4211 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M0rty | 99 | 0.0150 |
| #2 | Auschwitz Jew | 71 | 0.0226 |
| #3 | OneTappyPappy | 49 | 0.0085 |
| #4 | ϯ𝘦𝘦𝘻𝘺! | 36 | 0.0082 |
| #5 | noscopE | 31 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ϯ𝘦𝘦𝘻𝘺! | +1.45 | 48 | 48 |
| #2 | noscopE | +1.37 | 51 | 48 |
| #3 | OneTappyPappy | +1.37 | 68 | 58 |
| #4 | M0rty | +1.28 | 32 | 58 |
| #5 | Auschwitz Jew | +0.56 | 37 | 44 |





