








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 320 matches | ||
| Wingman | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




220 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3906 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,371 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5357 | 43% |
| Smokes | 3621 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1568 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 1825 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $189,750 of utility $21 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 183 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Greg from Jersey Shore | 47 | 0.0378 |
| #2 | M0rty | 25 | 0.0140 |
| #3 | NoAvrgJoe | 17 | 0.0054 |
| #4 | swagboy2000 ⛟♿ | 17 | 0.0125 |
| #5 | OneTappyPappy | 5 | 0.0062 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M0rty | 291 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #2 | NoAvrgJoe | 203 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #3 | OneTappyPappy | 116 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | Greg from Jersey Shore | 110 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | swagboy2000 ⛟♿ | 104 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rick Sanchez | +3.05 | 71 | 43 |
| #2 | OneTappyPappy | +1.37 | 57 | 57 |
| #3 | M0rty | +0.98 | 27 | 61 |
| #4 | Auschwitz Jew | +0.45 | 37 | 43 |
| #5 | swagboy2000 ⛟♿ | -1.08 | 49 | 42 |





