








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 331 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 177 matches | ||
| Wingman | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




50 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2260 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,521 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3552 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2698 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3565 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2706 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $870,321 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 800 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | weekend warrior | 68% | 19 |
| #2 | Kullirauta | 55% | 33 |
| #3 | Shadowcoins | 53% | 17 |
| #4 | Masa Mainio | 48% | 79 |
| #5 | Oggloc | 43% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | ☂ m1ku1i ☂ | 41% | 27 |
| #7 | SIPERIANTIIKERI | 41% | 32 |
| #8 | Fisuttaja | 37% | 35 |
| #9 | Rusakko | 35% | 26 |
| #10 | SUHINA | 11% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kullirauta | 7 | 0.0116 |
| #2 | ☂ m1ku1i ☂ | 5 | 0.0097 |
| #3 | Oggloc | 4 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | Masa Mainio | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | SIPERIANTIIKERI | 3 | 0.0050 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Masa Mainio | 258 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #2 | weekend warrior | 58 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #3 | Rusakko | 56 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | Fisuttaja | 47 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | ☂ m1ku1i ☂ | 45 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Masa Mainio | +2.53 | 59 | 80 |
| #2 | Shadowcoins | +2.08 | 59 | 77 |
| #3 | Rusakko | +1.31 | 36 | 51 |
| #4 | SUHINA | +0.56 | 64 | 51 |
| #5 | ☂ m1ku1i ☂ | +0.31 | 44 | 42 |





