








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 952 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 590 matches | ||
| Wingman | 178 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 108 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 11 matches | ||
| Esplay | 6 matches | 1,440 | |
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 53 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




169 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9154 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,606 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5185 | 28% |
| Smokes | 7292 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 2409 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 3720 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,528,100 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2583 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SIPERIANTIIKERI | 51% | 82 |
| #2 | CaptainCrack | 47% | 163 |
| #3 | smuaa | 46% | 126 |
| #4 | rc | 44% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SIPERIANTIIKERI | 51% | 82 |
| #2 | CaptainCrack | 47% | 163 |
| #3 | smuaa | 46% | 126 |
| #4 | rc | 44% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | smuaa | 21 | 0.0082 |
| #2 | SIPERIANTIIKERI | 9 | 0.0058 |
| #3 | rc | 6 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | CaptainCrack | 4 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | smuaa | 573 | 0.22 | 11 min |
| #2 | SIPERIANTIIKERI | 113 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #3 | rc | 87 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | CaptainCrack | 54 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CaptainCrack | +1.69 | 42 | 18 |
| #2 | SIPERIANTIIKERI | +1.60 | 75 | 64 |
| #3 | rc | +0.65 | 57 | 36 |
| #4 | Kullirauta | -0.09 | 29 | 36 |
| #5 | smuaa | -0.22 | 84 | 58 |





