








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 543 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 301 matches | ||
| Wingman | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 45 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5178 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,106 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6005 | 35% |
| Smokes | 4333 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3859 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2909 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $734,522 of utility $89 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 60 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fisermän | 54% | 205 |
| #2 | Jẻfẻ | 53% | 276 |
| #3 | 𝔎𝔢𝔦𝔰𝔞𝔯𝔦 | 51% | 51 |
| #4 | olli | 48% | 221 |
| #5 | Ratatoimitusjohtaja | 47% | 106 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | 𝔎𝔢𝔦𝔰𝔞𝔯𝔦 | 51% | 51 |
| #4 | olli | 48% | 221 |
| #5 | Ratatoimitusjohtaja | 47% | 106 |
| #6 | bob | 34% | 29 |
| #7 | Mikael Agrikosola | 32% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jẻfẻ | 39 | 0.0073 |
| #2 | Fisermän | 34 | 0.0083 |
| #3 | Ratatoimitusjohtaja | 8 | 0.0036 |
| #4 | 𝔎𝔢𝔦𝔰𝔞𝔯𝔦 | 8 | 0.0084 |
| #5 | olli | 6 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jẻfẻ | 692 | 0.13 | 13 min |
| #2 | Fisermän | 642 | 0.16 | 15 min |
| #3 | Ratatoimitusjohtaja | 354 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #4 | olli | 180 | 0.04 | 5 min |
| #5 | bob | 124 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bob2 | +4.61 | 83 | 71 |
| #2 | bob | +3.81 | 80 | 74 |
| #3 | Fisermän | -0.83 | 73 | 57 |
| #4 | Jẻfẻ | -0.92 | 56 | 50 |
| #5 | olli | -1.78 | 53 | 48 |





