








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 912 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 150 matches | ||
| Premier | 121 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 64 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3812 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,953 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2594 | 20% |
| Smokes | 3073 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3809 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 3477 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $951,643 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 717 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lipski | 67% | 46 |
| #2 | praT_tippen ein | 59% | 41 |
| #3 | onga bonga | 57% | 63 |
| #4 | -lazy | 56% | 25 |
| #5 | Zaubergurke | 56% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | D7 | +2.77 | 84 | 57 |
| #2 | WiwN | +1.80 | 72 | 61 |
| #3 | praT_tippen ein | +1.01 | 81 | 48 |
| #4 | Lipski | +0.74 | 77 | 57 |
| #5 | Manu | -0.30 | 84 | 28 |





