








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 124 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 53 matches | ||
| Wingman | 34 matches | ||
| Premier | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1402 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,219 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 733 | 23% |
| Smokes | 815 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 692 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 979 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $458,285 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 96 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Zaubergurke | 63% | 30 |
| #5 | WiwN | 61% | 44 |
| #6 | Rum is alle (LLX) | 61% | 36 |
| #7 | onga bonga | 58% | 84 |
| #8 | Manu | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | onga bonga | 11 | 0.0068 |
| #2 | D7 | 7 | 0.0072 |
| #3 | Rum is alle (LLX) | 2 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | WiwN | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Zaubergurke | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | teejaey | +3.03 | 79 | 49 |
| #2 | D7 | +2.47 | 80 | 60 |
| #3 | WiwN | +1.90 | 73 | 61 |
| #4 | Lipski | +0.93 | 77 | 50 |
| #5 | Manu | +0.73 | 82 | 46 |





