








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 597 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 62 matches | ||
| Wingman | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




46 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2921 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,309 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 895 | 17% |
| Smokes | 2095 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 1076 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1243 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $476,958 of utility $52 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2522 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Omega Bean | 66% | 38 |
| #2 | Mythical | 59% | 82 |
| #3 | tangerineyy | 56% | 36 |
| #4 | JimBim | 55% | 31 |
| #5 | Cdaysss | 54% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Mythical | 59% | 82 |
| #3 | tangerineyy | 56% | 36 |
| #4 | JimBim | 55% | 31 |
| #5 | Cdaysss | 54% | 85 |
| #6 | trooser | 23% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cdaysss | 23 | 0.0137 |
| #2 | Mythical | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Omega Bean | 3 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | tangerineyy | 3 | 0.0046 |
| #5 | trooser | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cdaysss | 187 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #2 | Mythical | 181 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | JimBim | 99 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #4 | Omega Bean | 84 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | trooser | 39 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Omega Bean | +5.94 | 61 | 42 |
| #2 | JimBim | +5.02 | 79 | 64 |
| #3 | Mythical | +2.55 | 72 | 55 |
| #4 | Valbitone | +1.04 | 45 | 27 |
| #5 | Cdaysss | -0.55 | 59 | 33 |





