








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1981 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 682 matches | ||
| Wingman | 197 matches | ||
| Faceit | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 64 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




102 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11832 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,365 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6938 | 27% |
| Smokes | 6643 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 5508 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 6276 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $5,118,392 of utility $191 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 832 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bich | 57% | 94 |
| #2 | Mythical | 54% | 441 |
| #3 | Cdaysss | 53% | 231 |
| #4 | tangerineyy | 50% | 225 |
| #5 | Triage | 48% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bich | 57% | 94 |
| #2 | Mythical | 54% | 441 |
| #3 | Cdaysss | 53% | 231 |
| #4 | tangerineyy | 50% | 225 |
| #5 | Triage | 48% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cdaysss | 55 | 0.0119 |
| #2 | Mythical | 28 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | tangerineyy | 10 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | bich | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | Triage | 2 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mythical | 422 | 0.05 | 9 min |
| #2 | Triage | 275 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #3 | Cdaysss | 248 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #4 | bich | 138 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | tangerineyy | 8 | 0.00 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mythical | +1.88 | 74 | 44 |
| #2 | Omega Bean | +1.59 | 59 | 44 |
| #3 | bich | -0.01 | 77 | 38 |
| #4 | Cdaysss | -0.68 | 54 | 22 |
| #5 | Triage | -1.40 | 59 | 52 |





