








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1060 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 246 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 75 matches | ||
| Wingman | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 66 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8268 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,717 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3893 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4254 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 4897 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 4673 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,063,988 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2161 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ADN | 26 | 0.0117 |
| #2 | NeqZaa | 12 | 0.0076 |
| #3 | Sarmoc | 8 | 0.0073 |





