








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1340 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 396 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 49 matches | ||
| Wingman | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 56 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




90 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8235 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,654 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2581 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1391 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 3826 | 40% |
| Molotovs | 1856 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,425,950 of utility $237 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1831 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | CheaterMan (notwashed) | 49% | 168 |
| #7 | 🄷🄰🅁🄳🅈 | 44% | 39 |
| #8 | ThatPattyGuy | 39% | 70 |
| #9 | MAD ZOMBI KILLA | 38% | 58 |
| #10 | Alzealot | 27% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Castorice | +2.42 | 80 | 62 |
| #2 | CAT (war) | +1.97 | 78 | 38 |
| #3 | Nolsey | -0.35 | 68 | 49 |
| #4 | CheaterMan (notwashed) | -0.40 | 63 | 44 |
| #5 | ThatPattyGuy | -0.65 | 63 | 36 |





