








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1322 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 305 matches | ||
| Wingman | 104 matches | ||
| Faceit | 97 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 58 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5890 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,708 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4589 | 26% |
| Smokes | 4782 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4651 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3686 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,630,982 of utility $208 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2510 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kRONENNN ;. | 45% | 56 |
| #2 | EindeutigDaniel.D5 | 42% | 57 |
| #3 | Bischof Stefan Oster | 42% | 67 |
| #4 | PrinceN -N- | 39% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kRONENNN ;. | 45% | 56 |
| #2 | EindeutigDaniel.D5 | 42% | 57 |
| #3 | Bischof Stefan Oster | 42% | 67 |
| #4 | PrinceN -N- | 39% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EindeutigDaniel.D5 | 6 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | kRONENNN ;. | 3 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | Bischof Stefan Oster | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | PrinceN -N- | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PrinceN -N- | 407 | 0.28 | 11 min |
| #2 | EindeutigDaniel.D5 | 254 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #3 | Bischof Stefan Oster | 205 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #4 | kRONENNN ;. | 197 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bischof Stefan Oster | +2.12 | 80 | 68 |
| #2 | Senor VAC | +2.09 | 67 | 57 |
| #3 | EindeutigDaniel.D5 | +1.99 | 54 | 64 |
| #4 | kRONENNN ;. | -1.78 | 49 | 67 |
| #5 | PrinceN -N- | -3.74 | 21 | 64 |





