








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1112 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 180 matches | ||
| Faceit | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 54 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4866 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,519 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5546 | 27% |
| Smokes | 6150 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4365 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 4458 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,540,094 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 700 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xer0n | 58% | 24 |
| #2 | nase | 53% | 104 |
| #3 | KingUbu | 53% | 36 |
| #4 | 2 : 1, Diaz best player | 51% | 68 |
| #5 | Rasenmäher | 49% | 178 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rasenmäher | 13 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | Senor VAC | 8 | 0.0055 |
| #3 | LBurgi | 7 | 0.0094 |
| #4 | EindeutigDaniel.D5 | 6 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | 2 : 1, Diaz best player | 6 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PrinceN -N- | 361 | 0.28 | 10 min |
| #2 | EindeutigDaniel.D5 | 276 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #3 | nase | 219 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #4 | kRONENNN ;. | 217 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #5 | Senor VAC | 185 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xer0n | +2.55 | 66 | 36 |
| #2 | Bischof Stefan Oster | +2.53 | 79 | 68 |
| #3 | 2 : 1, Diaz best player | +1.69 | 50 | 58 |
| #4 | EindeutigDaniel.D5 | +1.50 | 54 | 64 |
| #5 | Senor VAC | -0.36 | 57 | 58 |





